At nearly 30 weeks and feeling the baby and SEEING the baby kick my stomach inside and making it look like I have a little Joey Kangaroo in there---even Toddler Ann knows someone is in Mommy's stomach and we have tried to somewhat keep this from her in case...
I am just STUNNED beyond stunned that SOON I could be a Mother of two LIVING CHILDREN.
This infertile, overweight, frizzy haired woman that I am.
JUST STUNNING!!!!!
My doctor "scheduled" my c-section without even telling me.
I went for my check-up and she says, "Oh, did I tell you the date we scheduled you for?"
I was like, ah, "No..."
She tells me: "May 1st at 8 am."
WOW. Which is so funny because this is the Feast of St. Joseph the Worker and my husband is Joseph and of course we are naming this boy Joseph and wouldn't it just be SOOOO cool to have a baby on my favorite, beloved Saint's Feast Day?
St. Joseph also has another feast day in March that we always celebrate around here too with AWESOME ST. Joseph pastries and a big Italian meal.
And, of course it was St. Joseph that I asked to intercede for me and find me a good, worthy, Catholic husband and the Saint did not let me down!!!!
So, here is my dilemma...
Another c-section at age 41 1/2...and crazy me just can't stop thinking about having another baby at 42 or 43 or 44...
I am not a good candidate for VBAC anyways
as I am
overweight
have gestational diabetes
failed to make progress in Toddler Ann's birth
had a hysterscope operation a few months before conceiving toddler Ann to take out fibroids which weakens the uterus and makes one more prone to uterine rupture
did not dilate with Toddler Ann
water broke but did not go into labor
Blah, blah, blah....
I found c-sections to be EASY...but, am I choosing the option that will mean the finality of my fertility ONCE AND FOR ALL?
UGH.
My doctor said we would go past May 1st...to my real due date of May 5th and see what happens if I decide on a VBAC and then would just have to prepare for the emergency c-section event...
What would you do?
I hope I have outlined the situation clearly.
I know I can be confusing.
And, I have been reading the blogs of those of you who are now Mommys of two children/babies.
And, girding my loins...
True, Toddler Ann is 2 1/2 and that makes a world of difference between say, Irish Twins or babies that are only 15 months apart.
But, the shock and awe of it is there, keeping me up at night...putting a big, gigantic, smile on my face....
HOW CAN I BE A MOTHER OF TWO???
Unbelievable.
I would probably try for a VBAC. Then again, I am crazy, so take that with a grain of salt ;)
ReplyDeleteSo I'm sure I'm missing something here...will having a second C-section harm your future fertility? My SIL has had six C-sections, and I suspect there are people who have had more, so I didn't think that future pregnancies were out of the question. Of course, I don't know how fibroids enter into the mix, and obviously, my SIL is not infertile, so I'm sure I'm missing something here.
ReplyDeleteI would pray, make a decision and then trust God to take care of it. Don't second guess yourself. If God is going to grant you the miracle of another healthy baby at 42 what is the big deal with trusting him to make you have a healthy 3rd c section? I'm getting ready to have my 5th c section but my scar tissue looks so great I m playing around with the possibility of having my first VBAC as well.
ReplyDeleteThis is Abigail from abigail' s alcove not sure why my husband's name is on the comment box!
ReplyDeleteSoooo happy for you!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThat's a tough decision and one that I tried to make not long ago! I wanted a vbac, and my doc said I was a perfect candidate having had a vaginal birth before, but like you my water broke and I never went into labor. My big thing was that I didn't want an emergency section because I didn't want to be unconscious during the birth. That was huge for me. I was lucky in that I was able to get the spinal and avoid an emergency.
ReplyDeleteSo I would say, what's your biggest concern? It sounds like it's not being able to have a third section, which you should totally be able to do unless there's a major problem like too much scar tissue or a very thin uterus from surgery. But I would think that's super unlikely with only 1 section behind you, right?
Knowing the statistics, that 60% of vbac's end in sections and your list of reasons why you are not a good candidate for one, and the awesomeness of having baby Joseph born on the Feast of St. Joseph!, I would probably schedule a section. Personally. I'm not saying that you should, but that's what my tendency would be.
I'm praying you find great peace in whatever you decide. In the end, happy baby and happy mom!
Your time is so close to meeting your little guy! I'm so excited for you. No advice on what to do about the VBAC or c-section, but praying you are able to come to a decision and have peace about it!
ReplyDeleteYou need to do whatever you feel most at peace doing, but maybe it's a sign from Him that Baby Joseph is scheduled to be born on St. Joseph's feast day by c-section? Something to think about anyway! Praying for you always.
ReplyDelete(Formerly Patiently Waiting)
As someone who is married to a Joseph, I definitely think that May 1st is a great day to have your baby! I've been told that I will have to have a c-section (yes, putting the cart WAY before the horse) because of my multiple surgeries, so it doesn't seem that bad.
ReplyDeleteI definitely think it's St. Joseph trying to tell you something!
p.s. Your story gives me so much hope!
Oh, and the "I" in my title post is what is italized. Meaning...how can I be the one so blessed? Not the two. Not worried about the two at all.
ReplyDeleteBring it on!!!!
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ReplyDeleteOh my goodness!! I just found your wonderful blog! I was adopted at birth in 1972 and am also thrilled to be alive! Also, with my four kids the scariest moment was when I left the hospital with my second and realized I was going to have to take care of 2!!!!! It will be a breeze!! Enjoy! Katie
ReplyDeleteCongratulations! Sorry no advice on the c-section vs. vbac. Pray about it, make a decision and trust in God. (I think Abby said the same thing).
ReplyDeleteSo excited for you though!
My thinking about the C-Section limiting my fertility is that you are "suppose" to space them apart and by the time I do this...well, I will have aged out of being able to have another.
ReplyDeleteThat's all.
God is ultimately in charge, yes? I am proof that c-sections and "spacing" do not seem to adversely affect fertility for everyone. My doc said to have at least 18 months between births. Most people don't have them that closely spaced.
DeleteEnjoy this pregnancy and the resulting miracle! The rest will take care of itself.
I think you'll be fine no matter what happens! I'd try to go natural and see what happens, although I've had 2 vaginal births (no c-sections) so what do I know?!?
ReplyDeleteI think it would be so neat to have a C-section on May 1st. But if you'd want to try for a VBAC, I'd do that. It doesn't hurt to try ... you have a backup plan.
ReplyDeleteTough decision- hmmmm. I agree with Abigail. See what happens and if you need one, God will find a way for you to have another baby if he will it!! By the way, thanks for your comments a few weeks back on my blog- you gave me tons of food for thought!! God bless
ReplyDeleteAt my 6 week appointment post c-section my doctor asked what birth control I wanted (of course)! When I told her I wouldn't be taking any BC she didn't discourage me or warn me about becoming pregnant again so quickly after, so I think having multiple c-sections is ok as long as there aren't any complications. My girlfriend (who went to the same doctor as me) had 2 c-sections within 15 months. No problemo! So, just pray. You'll figure it out.
ReplyDeleteTwo is so much easier than one! They entertain each other all day long, starting when the little one is a tiny baby. It is awesome! My first two are 25 months apart, and Madeleine was so helpful when John Paul was born. It was a very easy transition. John Paul was 19 months when Leo was born, that was a little harder ;)
ReplyDelete